Scottish enlightenment

This week, the Diary brings you an update on how many students it takes to change a light bulb in Scotland.

Readers may recall the English picture. At the University of Cambridge, for example, it takes three students - one to mix the Martinis, one to call the electrician and one to call daddy to pay the bill.

North of the border at the University of Strathclyde, five students are needed - one to design a nuclear-powered light bulb that never needs changing, one to figure out how to power the rest of Scotland using it, two to install it and one to write the computer program that controls the wall switch. At the University of Dundee, the figure rises to ten - one to buy and fit the bulb and nine to petition for the electrification of Dundee. At Stirling University, it's none - Stirling looks better in the dark.