Following The Diary's revelation last week that students drop out of London Metropolitan University faster than they can change the light bulbs, staff there have taken to doing the job themselves. But how many staff does it take? The answer is 230. These people are employed in tasks such as reporting that the bulb has blown and sitting on the light bulb replacement task group (LBRTG). Others have roles in conducting an institution-wide audit of light bulbs to see whether needs can be met from within existing provision and in suspending the LBRTG and referring its work to the senior management team. Finally, it takes two people to pocket thousands of pounds worth of bonuses as a result of the successful completion of the first stage of the light-bulb change implementation and development plan.