Campus statues for ‘anti-woke’ champions divide UK academia

New university monuments will guard against culture war attacks, vice-chancellors argue

April 1, 2024
Nigel Farage statue on college campus
Source: Getty Images/iStock montage

Plans to erect statues of Donald Trump, Jordan Peterson and other prominent “anti-woke” advocates on UK universities have received a mixed reaction from academia.

In a move designed to head off criticism from science secretary Michelle Donelan that the “slow creep of wokeism” poses a threat to British research, university leaders have commissioned a series of striking campus monuments to honour right-wing figures known for their plain speaking and trenchant opposition to political correctness.

“We’ve told the public about our commitment to free speech and viewpoint diversity countless times, but the message isn’t getting through – we need to do something different,” said one exasperated vice-chancellor on his university’s planned bronze of Nigel Farage, the Brexit-supporting former UKIP leader.

“When we’re next accused of being a hotbed of radical socialism, I’ll be able to point to our statue of Nigel with a cigar in his hand and sipping a pint, and have the last laugh.”

The plan to memorialise a series of “anti-woke champions” will seek to avoid what one university leader called “overwrought modernist madness” such as the 12ft monument to the late Duke of Edinburgh in academic robes, set to be torn down after being described by Cambridge City Council as the “worst public artwork ever seen”.

With Donald Trump odds-on to win November’s US presidential election, a 20ft statue of the business mogul-turned-politician earmarked for the new library foyer might also entice him on to campus during his next UK visit, speculated another university leader.

“Trump is setting up his own ‘anti-woke university’ so perhaps we could swap stories about how that’s going,” he explained.

“We’ve also encouraged our academics to start using Mr Trump’s Truth Social network as they’ll be able to connect with a more diverse range of people rather than the echo chamber of leftie lecturers on academic Twitter.”

Some scholars have, however, questioned whether these new figures should replace existing statues in Britain’s ancient seats of learning.

“Jordan Peterson deserves a statue for his rejection of preferred pronouns but I’m not sure he should take Isaac Newton’s place in Trinity College, Cambridge,” said Ivor Binhad, Regius professor of physics at Tallstory College. “He’s more a Peterhouse man.”

Meanwhile the high-profile Oxford classicist Issa Prank questioned whether UK higher education was wise to curry political favour with the Tories in this way given they faced electoral wipeout in the next general election.

“Liz Truss has done sterling work to highlight the insidious ‘deep state’ pushing wokeness but erecting a statue of her at Oxford might not be wise. Especially if we want Sir Keir Starmer to open our new mindfulness and well-being centre.”

POSTSCRIPT:

This story was an April Fool.

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Reader's comments (1)

A good April fool!

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