The hard line on linen

Breaking news from Bradford University: a message posted on the front page of the university's internal staff website - under "Latest news" - reveals that the marketing department has lost a tablecloth. "Could anyone who has any new black, white and magenta tablecloths in their possession check the numbers on them, because Marketing's #38 has gone astray," the message says. It is needed in time for an open day, but "if you find it later than that" the department would still like it back, as it cost £60 - which will be charged to the anonymous school that mislaid it, staff are warned.