Lose friends and irritate people

Since the job advertisement for higher education's most unpopular new position - director of the Office for Fair Access - appeared in The Times Higher four weeks ago it seems that vice-chancellors across the country have been rushing to apply for further details. (They insist, of course, that this is simply a matter of staying in the loop.) However, those who are dreaming of a management revolution at their university should think again. The package is unlikely to tempt any university head who isn't already signed up for retirement. The full job specification reveals that the post will be full time with a healthy £70,000 salary for the first six months, but will dribble away to a mere one day a week after that.

Is this the higher calling that Bernadette Porter, who has stepped down as vice-chancellor of Roehampton University, has been looking for? Perhaps not. Are you a retired vice-chancellor looking to alienate your former colleagues with your meddling? Apply here.